Odd and Even – Wang Xiaofeng

As Beijing restricts odd-numbered cars to driving on odd days and even-numbered cars to driving on even days in a test-run of its Olympics traffic reduction plan, one of the city’s more prominent and irreverent bloggers fantasizes about the potential of “odd-even” (ÂçïÂèåÂè∑Ôºârestrictions to solve some of the country’s other problems. Translated by CDT:

Citizens with odd-numbered birthdays can only go out on odd days, citizens with even-numbered birthdays can only go out on even days. This way we can “reduce” Beijing’s population almost by half, relieve pressure on public transportation, and thin out the crowds in markets, restaurants, parks and other public areas.

To save energy: Restrict electricity use to odd-numbered floors on odd days, even-numbered floors on even days.

Citizens with odd-numbered birthdays can only go online on odd days, citizens with even-numbered birthdays on even days. This way we can relieve congestion on the Internet.

Citizens with odd-numbered birthdays can only eat pork on odd days, citizens with even-numbered birthdays can only eat pork on even days. Think, would pork prices keep rising?

Citizens with odd-numbered birthdays can only go to work on odd days, citizens with even numbered birthdays can only go to work on even days.

On odd days, people can only go to Dongdan (东单)or Xidan (西单). On even days, they can only go to Wangfujing.

On odd days movie theaters can only show “Riding Alone for Thousands of Miles” (ÂçÉÈáå˵∞ÂçïÈ™ëÔºâ, on even days they can only show ÔºªDavid Lynch’s] “Twin Peaks” (ÂèåÂ≥∞ÈïáÔºâ.

On odd days, China Mobile can only collect fees one-way (单向收费). On even days, they can collect fees both ways (双向收费).

On odd days, leaders can only sleep with their wives (大奶). On even days, they can only sleep with their second-wives (二奶,i.e., mistresses).

Read the original in Chinese here.

Also see more from and about Wang Xiaofeng here.

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