{"id":694639,"date":"2023-08-02T17:24:57","date_gmt":"2023-08-03T00:24:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chinadigitaltimes.net\/?p=694639"},"modified":"2023-08-10T15:59:39","modified_gmt":"2023-08-10T22:59:39","slug":"translation-chang-ping-riffs-on-beleaguered-comedians-stray-dogs-and-the-pla","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chinadigitaltimes.net\/2023\/08\/translation-chang-ping-riffs-on-beleaguered-comedians-stray-dogs-and-the-pla\/","title":{"rendered":"Translation: Chang Ping Riffs on Beleaguered Comedians, Stray Dogs, and the PLA"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
In mainland China, August 1 is known as PLA Day or Army Day<\/a>, and commemorates the establishment of the Chinese People\u2019s Liberation Army (PLA) in 1927. This year, the celebration of the PLA\u2019s 96th anniversary coincided with a major (and possibly corruption-related) shake-up in the PLA’s Rocket Force<\/a>; some Central Military Commission guidelines for enhancing \u201cParty-building\u201d in the military<\/a>; and a Ministry of State Security exhortation to mobilize the masses to assist with counter-espionage work<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The PLA, somewhat counterintuitively, has also become associated with a crackdown on stand-up comedy. The comedy clampdown<\/a> began in early May of 2023, after comedian Li Haoshi, who performs under the moniker \u201cHouse,\u201d touched off an online firestorm<\/a> with a joke comparing feral dogs with soldiers by referencing a PLA slogan coined by Xi Jinping: \u201cForge Exemplary Conduct, Fight to Win<\/a>!\u201d House was accused of “disparaging the People’s soldiers” and blacklisted from performing<\/a>; his employer, comedy studio Xiaoguo Culture, was fined nearly $2 million dollars<\/a> and prohibited from putting on any comedy shows for the foreseeable future. The harsh punishment has exerted a chilling effect<\/a> on China\u2019s already-beleaguered comedy circles<\/a>. It seems likely that artists and performers who poke fun at the military<\/a>, either intentionally or inadvertently, will continue to draw the ire of ardent nationalists and be subject to criminal or civil punishments.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In a piece originally published<\/a> by Deutsche Welle (DW) and archived at China Digital Space, journalist and current affairs commentator Chang Ping touches on these topics and more, as he flashes forward and imagines how a stand-up comedy routine might go in China, circa 2049<\/strong><\/a>. A full translation of the piece appears below, with explanatory links and endnotes added by CDT editors.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thank you, thank you. What a crowd! I’m Villa, a stand-up comic just like my dad, House (Li Haoshi<\/a>). It\u2019s 2049, and we\u2019re celebrating the founding of a “Newer China.” What I’m about to do is called “stand-up,” or “stand-up comedy.” Don\u2019t worry if you\u2019ve never heard of it\u2014the last stand-up performance in China was in 2023. In those days, the TV sensation sweeping the nation was China’s “Two Sessions<\/a>“: the “National People\u2019s Clownfest” and the “Chinese People\u2019s Parody and Comedy Conference.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n It sounds like two different things, I know\u2014one where insiders roast each other mercilessly, and one where performers entertain the audience with jokes. But in fact, the “Two Sessions” were produced by a single company<\/a> and directed by a single boss<\/a>. There was even a kind of voting that they called \u201cwhole-process People\u2019s democracy,<\/a>\u201d but when it came down to it, the “Kings of Comedy” were always chosen by unanimous vote<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I know some of you are thinking, \u201cWhat?\u201d or wondering what I\u2019m doing telling neihan duanzi<\/em><\/a>, jokes that rely on subtext, in this day and age. We’ve had a whole “Revolution of our Times<\/a>,” so now if we want to voice an opinion about the government, we can just come out and say it. No need to hem and haw, right? But back then, comedians had to waste a lot of time figuring out how to be funny without offending anybody. That\u2019s where the ingenuity came in. A Chinese literary lion<\/a> once told an anecdote about Goethe and Beethoven<\/a> out for a walk together. When they saw the Empress’ retinue approaching. Beethoven ignored it and kept walking, head held high, but Goethe took off his hat and bowed. Back in the day, Chinese people must have felt like it was easy to be brash and disrespectful like Beethoven, but to grovel like Goethe took real courage. <\/p>\n\n\n\n People get nostalgic<\/a>, I know. This one older comic was telling me how great things were back in the day\u2014by which he meant a couple decades ago, six or seven years after the comedy ban came down. You could stage a whole comedy show without anybody in the theater laughing: audiences weren\u2019t sure if fun was even allowed, or if laughing was disrespectful to the performers, or if a laugh would get them investigated<\/a> by the Beijing \u201cculture cops.\u201d<\/a> Not that the performers cared whether the audience was laughing or not\u2014it wasn\u2019t their job to care. All they had to worry about was making sure that their popularganda was edutaining enough<\/a>. It was the ultimate in \u201cpolitical co-rekt-ness<\/a>.\u201d That generation of performers sacrificed everything for the cause of building the Newer China\u2014a lot of them are still in the loony bin. I heard a doctor talking about one of the more serious cases once: A former commander of the culture cops goes out for a stroll and this guy\u2019s just staring and staring at him. Stares at him for three days straight. Finally, on day four, the commander had to call a doctor to help him put his pants back on. Tragic stuff! <\/span>1<\/sup><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n There used to be three types of comedy: tragicomedy, tragedy, and venti. The moment a performer stepped onstage, wham, the audience was bawling for joy. One big international polling firm, Ipsos, did a \u201cGlobal Happiness\u201d survey. They looked at 32 countries, and the one with the highest \u201cHappiness Index\u201d was China, with 91%<\/a>. The U.S. (with 76%) came in 14th, and Japan (with 60%) came in 29th. South Korea (with 57%) was third from last. If they\u2019d been able to rank Taiwan as an independent country, I bet it would\u2019ve come in dead last.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I know what you\u2019re thinking: If Chinese people didn\u2019t know whether they were allowed to laugh, or even how<\/em> to laugh, how come their \u201cHappiness Index\u201d was so high? Because they were laughing in secret<\/a>! If you\u2019re living in China, you\u2019ve got to know how to laugh in secret!<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Two Forbidden Topics<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n We had kind-hearted leaders in those days, wonderfully kind. They couldn\u2019t bear to see poor people suffering, so they turfed the \u201clow-end population\u201d out of Beijing<\/a> and forbade the media from reporting on anything to do with poor people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Naturally there were still some incorrigibles who insisted on talking about, singing about, and even caring<\/em> about the poor. The authorities encouraged the public to report these incorrigibles<\/a>, and so many people snitched<\/a> on them that we ran out of reporting slips and everyone had to walk around holding blank sheets of white paper. History remembers this as the \u201cWhite Paper Movement<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Some people will tell you that stand-up comedians weren\u2019t allowed to talk about anything. Actually, for a law-abiding comic, only two topics were off-limits: this<\/em> and that<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My dad House was one of the law-abiding ones. If he\u2019d gone on stage and just stood in silence for five minutes, someone would have ratted him out, because wouldn\u2019t his silence be read as \u201cexpressing support for the White Paper Movement<\/a>\u201d? So he had to say something<\/em>. Other comedians tried to fill his head with nonsense about stand-up comedy being a transgressive art form, but my father didn\u2019t fall for it. He wasn\u2019t trying to offend people\u2014but he had no qualms about offending dogs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n He and my mom had adopted two stray dogs. Feral dogs, more accurately. Back then, in May of 2023, those dogs only understood two languages: if you shouted at them, they knew you were angry; if you cooed at them, they knew you were getting ready to feed them, and they\u2019d jump up and put their paws on you. They had no idea they were about to hit Weibo\u2019s \u201cTrending Topics\u201d list<\/a> and become the mutts heard \u2018round the world\u2014and they never could have imagined that 20 years later, after the founding of the Newer China, there would be statues of them in the National Comedy Museum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Just a couple of feral dogs, quietly living their little feral-dog lives. My mom and dad rescued them: \u201crescued,\u201d quote-unquote, as if those dogs didn\u2019t already have a penthouse view from the tip-top of the local food chain. You know how most dogs are cute and lovable? Not these ones. They were fighters, not lovers\u2014if they caught sight of a squirrel, they\u2019d be off chasing it like highly trained special forces. My dad was watching them do just that when a phrase flashed into his mind: \u201cForge Exemplary Conduct, Fight to Win<\/a>!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n And the rest is history\u2014you learned about it in your school textbooks. But here\u2019s the Cliffs-Notes version: some so-called \u201caudience member\u201d recorded the routine and reported that particular joke for \u201cinsulting the People\u2019s soldiers.\u201d It turned into a whole thing, and shot straight up the Weibo \u201cTrending Topics\u201d list.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If the Veterans Had Guns, Who Would They Take Out First?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n My father apologized. So did his management company, Xiaoguo Culture. But it wasn\u2019t enough for the \u201cPatriotic Big V\u2019s<\/a>\u201d who wanted to see him thrown in jail for insulting the military. Their rallying cry was: \u201cLike and Retweet, everyone! We\u2019re gonna make \u2018em pay!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n These days, of course, the same people are always talking about how their freedom of speech was infringed upon, how much they hated authoritarianism, and how they strove for a democratic China. The same thing happened with the first Cultural Revolution, too. But at the time, they were the ones saying that comedy wasn\u2019t a get-out-of-jail-free card and talking about how Li Dan<\/a>, the head of Xiaoguo Culture, ought to have his comedy-making tools confiscated and be stripped of his comedy privileges for the rest of his days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The Beijing culture cops got so many complaints from the public that they had to set up a special task force to investigate the case. It didn\u2019t take them long to determine the appropriate punishment for Xiaoguo Culture: confiscation of 1.32 million yuan ($184,000) in revenues, a fine of 13.35 million yuan ($1.86 million), and the indefinite suspension of all of its performances in Beijing, on the grounds that \u201celements in one performance were grossly insulting to the People\u2019s Army, thus exerting a malign influence on society.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n My father once saved up 120,000 yuan ($16,700) to get into investing, thinking he was going to be the King of Trades and a legendary A-share dealmaker. \u201cRetail investors would worship me, funds would fear me, the Securities Regulatory Commission would investigate me, but turn up no wrongdoing.\u201d My father\u2019s dream was to take his millions and retire to the pastoral life, turning his back on the bloodbath of the stock market with one final message: \u201cWarren Buffett, eat your heart out!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n As it happened, history would remember him for a different six words: \u201cForge Exemplary Conduct, Fight to Win.\u201d Eight characters at 1.83 million yuan (over $250,000) a pop, all payable to the government.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In the days and months that followed, the question my father kept coming back to was, would that money go to the soldiers he\u2019d \u201cinsulted?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Online, some people said that if the veterans he\u2019d insulted could take up arms again, it\u2019d be curtains for House and for Xiaoguo Culture. Government officials, however, knew perfectly well who would be first on the to-do list of any armed veterans. Hey, Patriotic Big V\u2019s, any of you ever try asking the \u201cPeople\u2019s soldiers\u201d who you \u201clove and respect\u201d so much what they<\/em> thought? You don\u2019t know who they\u2019ve really<\/em> got it in for? Well, no matter. We all found out in the end.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAre You Saying All Soldiers Aren\u2019t<\/em> Dogs?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n In the comments under a Weibo article about Xiaoguo Culture and House being accused of insulting the PLA, one internet user from Dalian, @\u82b1\u82b1\u82b1\u672a\u592eHWY, voiced her disapproval of House\u2019s blacklisting, and added: \u201cAre you saying all soldiers aren\u2019t<\/em> dogs?<\/a>\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n In those halcyon days, naturally she got reported, too. The Dalian police uncovered her identity and arrested her<\/a> for posting \u201cinappropriate online comments about the troops.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cAre you saying all soldiers aren\u2019t<\/em> dogs?\u201d My father said he had no answer to that question. Some people said the \u201cPeople\u2019s soldiers\u201d weren\u2019t feral dogs; they were the Zhao family<\/a> private guard, lapdogs of the ruling class<\/a>. And as everyone knows, one or two of the prettier ones were the very model of a singing major-general. <\/span>2<\/sup><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n All my dad knew for sure was that the soldiers weren\u2019t the feral dogs he\u2019d been talking about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n He\u2019d been perfectly clear: The feral dogs he was talking about \u201chad a penthouse view at the tip-top of the local food chain.\u201d Could you say as much for the \u201cvolunteer army\u201d that had to hunt squirrels for food while serving in the trenches of the Korean War? Or the \u201cold veterans<\/a>\u201d of the Sino-Vietnamese War, who spent years trying in vain to get anyone to hear their petitions<\/a>? If you asked those veterans, some would say, \u201cWhat\u2019s a \u2018penthouse?\u2019\u201d or \u201cWhat\u2019s a \u2018food chain?\u2019\u201d or even \u201cWhat\u2019s \u2018food?\u2019\u201d And some would ask what it would take for them to be feral dogs, too. You couldn\u2019t be the kind of feral dog my father was talking about if you didn\u2019t have family connections: at the time, there was no prouder boast than \u201cMy dad is a feral dog!<\/a>\u201d It was the next best thing to \u201cwolf warrior<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Some people who couldn\u2019t tell a joke made a quick 14.67 million yuan (nearly $2 million dollars) off someone who could. Talk about mighty hunters\u2014they must have come from a long line of feral dogs! My father rarely singled people out in his act: he\u2019d been raised better than to get personal. But those so-called cultural law enforcement officers weren\u2019t very nice people, so they didn\u2019t count as such. <\/span>3<\/sup><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n They couldn\u2019t take a joke, so they shut down the entire comedy industry and blamed it on the troops. Taking the blame was what the troops were there for\u2014the ones who couldn\u2019t sing and look cute, at least. No wonder they ended up getting \u201cliberated\u201d by Taiwan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Later, my father reflected that the inadvertent role he and his dogs had played in history, the permanent association he\u2019d drawn between \u201cthe troops\u201d and \u201cferal dogs,\u201d may well have arisen from nothing more than simple jealousy on the part of certain people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For whatever reason, there will always be certain people who go around looking average yet feeling confident<\/a> <\/span>4<\/sup><\/a><\/span>\u2014having \u201cfour matters of confidence<\/a>,\u201d in fact. <\/span>5<\/sup><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n And those six words that got my dad in trouble? He certainly wasn\u2019t the first to say them. <\/span>6<\/sup><\/a><\/span> They\u2019d been the subject of newspaper articles, but never got much traction online. But as soon as my dad uttered them, suddenly they were on everyone\u2019s lips. The contrast must have stung a bit, for the \u201caverage-yet-incongruously-confident\u201d crowd.<\/p>\n\n\n\n After it all blew up, official media outlets ran articles stating their positions on the matter. The People\u2019s Daily<\/em> Weibo account sermonized: \u201cHaving things one does not disrespect, things one doesn\u2019t say, and lines one doesn\u2019t cross is a professional baseline, and should become the industry consensus.\u201d Being a professional comedian, my father could tell right away what that<\/em> was making fun of\u2014\u201cUniversal Values<\/a>!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thanks, ladies and gents, you\u2019ve been a great audience. This is Villa, signing off! [Chinese<\/a><\/strong>]<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n\n