我们不谈观点和立场,只聊文法和逻辑,童鞋们切勿对号入座。今后在别处回帖前建议三思而后行=V=

—————————————-以下才是极品的转帖内容——————————————-

将网友们所列举的几种常见的脑残文法综合起来,以供有关人士对照阅读
在这里,特意向参与这些文法整理的猫扑网友们致敬!

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:隔壁家那鸭蛋更难吃,你咋不说呢?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:请拿出建设性的意见来,有本事你下个好吃的蛋来。

(话说这是典型的我不会制冷我就不能评论电冰箱我不会拍电影就不能写影评的逻辑)

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:下蛋的是一只勤劳勇敢善良正直的鸡。

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:比前年的蛋已经进步很多了。

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:你就是吃这鸡蛋长大的,你有什么权力说这蛋不好吃?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:你这么说是什么居心什么目的?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:自己家鸡下的蛋都说不好吃,你还是不是中国人

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:tmd,我怀疑你是轮子

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:光抱怨有什么用,有这个时间还不如努力去赚钱

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:台湾网T,gun,这里不欢迎你

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:幼右心理阴暗,连鸡蛋不好吃也要发牢骚

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:该鸡蛋被一小撮不会下蛋的母鸡煽动导致变臭

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:该用户发言已被猫扑管理员屏蔽

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.中国的鸡蛋就难吃,美国的鸡蛋就好吃?卖国贼!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.台湾的鸡蛋好吃,你去呀,看不核平了你!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.中国的鸡蛋已经可以打败美国的鸭蛋,自豪!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.祖国的鸡生的蛋,再难吃我也不嫌弃!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.外国主子给你多少钱,你在这儿胡说?

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.你竟敢说我们养鸡场的鸡蛋难吃?你站在谁的立场上说话?

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.端起碗吃蛋,放下筷子骂娘,不知好歹,忘恩负义,无耻!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.难吃的鸡蛋是极少数,绝大多数鸡蛋是好的,是优秀的,是经得起考验的!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是少数不法分子在蒙蔽不明真相的群众!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是别有用心的煽动,你想干什么?

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是谣言,我可以负责任地说,我们的鸡蛋都是合格的!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是没有根据的,希望媒体能客观报道。

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.我看,有些人的鸡蛋不怎么样,我们的鸡蛋好五倍

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.正确的导向是我们养鸡场之福,错误的导向是我们养鸡场之祸!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.我们养鸡场处于初级阶段,必须坚持基本养鸡方法二十年不动摇!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.我们要建设有自己特色的养鸡场,让母鸡下出有自己特色的蛋!

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,虽然口感差了点,但对我们的身体是有益的,如果擅自引进一只美国蛋,我们的吸收系统和胃的承受力乃至整个内分泌,恐怕都会崩溃的。——理性左派学者。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,这只鸡蛋难吃和地震无关——地震专家。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,有国外敌对势力擅自对我国鸡蛋说三道四——刘建超。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,中国鸡,加油!——中国爱国青年。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,鉴于北京食客无理取闹地说鸡蛋难吃,我们两次赴京说服劝解,无效。——上海警方

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:这是近日猫扑有人别有用心的造谣。

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:你是少数不明真相的人,怎么可能难吃呢?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:国福民强,你杂不换鸡肉吃?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:没有一只蛋是十全十美的,所以就无权对蛋说三道四!

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:大清的蛋好不好吃,清朝人 民最清楚

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:想想旧社会,穷人连饭都吃不上,每天咽糠吃野菜, 今天的幸福生活是无数先烈用生命和鲜血换来的, 你要好好珍惜啊

A:此鸡蛋真难吃
B:这是鸡下蛋的初级阶段,要吃好鸡蛋,要到高级阶段,这初级阶段是一个很漫长的过程

我们不谈观点和立场,只聊文法和逻辑,童鞋们切勿对号入座。今后在别处回帖前建议三思而后行=V=

—————————————-以下才是极品的转帖内容——————————————-

将猫扑网友们所列举的几种常见的脑残文法综合起来,以供有关人士对照阅读
在这里,特意向参与这些文法整理的猫扑网友们致敬!

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:隔壁家那鸭蛋更难吃,你咋不说呢?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:请拿出建设性的意见来,有本事你下个好吃的蛋来。

(话说这是典型的我不会制冷我就不能评论电冰箱我不会拍电影就不能写影评的逻辑)

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:下蛋的是一只勤劳勇敢善良正直的鸡。

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:比前年的蛋已经进步很多了。

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:你就是吃这鸡蛋长大的,你有什么权力说这蛋不好吃?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:你这么说是什么居心什么目的?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:自己家鸡下的蛋都说不好吃,你还是不是中国人

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:tmd,我怀疑你是轮子

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:光抱怨有什么用,有这个时间还不如努力去赚钱

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:台湾网T,gun,这里不欢迎你

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:幼右心理阴暗,连鸡蛋不好吃也要发牢骚

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:该鸡蛋被一小撮不会下蛋的母鸡煽动导致变臭

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:该用户发言已被猫扑管理员屏蔽

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.中国的鸡蛋就难吃,美国的鸡蛋就好吃?卖国贼!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.台湾的鸡蛋好吃,你去呀,看不核平了你!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.中国的鸡蛋已经可以打败美国的鸭蛋,自豪!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.祖国的鸡生的蛋,再难吃我也不嫌弃!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.外国主子给你多少钱,你在这儿胡说?

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.你竟敢说我们养鸡场的鸡蛋难吃?你站在谁的立场上说话?

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.端起碗吃蛋,放下筷子骂娘,不知好歹,忘恩负义,无耻!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.难吃的鸡蛋是极少数,绝大多数鸡蛋是好的,是优秀的,是经得起考验的!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是少数不法分子在蒙蔽不明真相的群众!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是别有用心的煽动,你想干什么?

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是谣言,我可以负责任地说,我们的鸡蛋都是合格的!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.这是没有根据的,希望媒体能客观报道。

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.我看,有些人的鸡蛋不怎么样,我们的鸡蛋好五倍

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.正确的导向是我们养鸡场之福,错误的导向是我们养鸡场之祸!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.我们养鸡场处于初级阶段,必须坚持基本养鸡方法二十年不动摇!

A.这鸡蛋真难吃。
B.我们要建设有自己特色的养鸡场,让母鸡下出有自己特色的蛋!

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,虽然口感差了点,但对我们的身体是有益的,如果擅自引进一只美国蛋,我们的吸收系统和胃的承受力乃至整个内分泌,恐怕都会崩溃的。——理性左派学者。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,这只鸡蛋难吃和地震无关——地震专家。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,有国外敌对势力擅自对我国鸡蛋说三道四——刘建超。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,中国鸡,加油!——中国爱国青年。

A,这只鸡蛋真难吃。
B,鉴于北京食客无理取闹地说鸡蛋难吃,我们两次赴京说服劝解,无效。——上海警方

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:这是近日猫扑有人别有用心的造谣。

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:你是少数不明真相的人,怎么可能难吃呢?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:国福民强,你杂不换鸡肉吃?

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:没有一只蛋是十全十美的,所以就无权对蛋说三道四!

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:大清的蛋好不好吃,清朝人 民最清楚

A:这鸡蛋真难吃。
B:想想旧社会,穷人连饭都吃不上,每天咽糠吃野菜, 今天的幸福生活是无数先烈用生命和鲜血换来的, 你要好好珍惜啊

A:此鸡蛋真难吃
B:这是鸡下蛋的初级阶段,要吃好鸡蛋,要到高级阶段,这初级阶段是一个很漫长的过程

This post has been making the rounds on the intertubes, the version we’re translating comes from Anti-CNN. It’s a satirical guide for prospective Fifty Cents Party members on the many methods they can use to respond to criticism:

Translation
Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: The duck egg next door is even worse tasting, how could you not mention this?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Please make a constructive comment, if you’ve got talent then lay a better tasting egg yourself.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: This egg was laid by an industrious, courageous, good, kind, honest, and upright chicken!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: It’s way better than last year’s egg.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: You grew up [by] eating this egg, what right do you have to say it tastes bad?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: What intentions are you harboring to make you say this?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: You criticize the eggs that come from your own chicken, are you or are you not Chinese?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Fuck, I suspect you are a “wheel” [liar, or probably more likely FLG member?].

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Just complaining is useless, if you have extra time you’d be better off working hard to earn money.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Taiwanese netizen, fuck off, we don’t welcome you here.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Aw, Youyou’s mentality is so gloomy, even has to grouse about bad-tasing eggs!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: The egg is bad because the hen who laid this egg was incited by some [bad] hens who can’t lay eggs.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: This comment has already been screened by the moderator.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: So China’s eggs all taste bad, and America’s eggs all taste good? Traitor!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Taiwan’s eggs are good, go there why don’t you, see if you don’t get leveled by a nuclear bomb*

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: China’s eggs can already defeat America’s eggs, be proud!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: I won’t avoid eggs from the motherland no matter how bad they are!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: You dare to say the eggs from our chicken farm taste bad? What position are you speaking from?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Carrying a bowl to eat eggs, then putting down the chopsticks to curse, you don’t know what’s good for you, ungrateful, shameless and brazen!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Bad tasting eggs are a tiny minority, the majority of eggs are good, excellent, and stand up to testing!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: This is a small group of criminals deceiving the unaware-of-the-truth masses!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: This is having an ulterior motive and inciting [others], what are you trying to do?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: That is a rumor, I can responsibly say that all eggs are up to quality standards!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: There is no basis to this, I hope the media can report objectively!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: I think some people’s eggs aren’t that great, our eggs are five times better!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: The correct orientation is the happiness of our chicken farm, the erroneous orientation is the misfortune of our chicken farm.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Our chicken farm is still in the early stages, we must persist [on this course] for the next twenty years without wavering!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: We want to found a chicken farm with our own special characteristics, and have our hens lay eggs with their own special characteristics.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Although the taste is a bit worse, it has benefits for our health, if you import an American egg without authorization, your digestive system and stomach, perhaps even your entire endocrine system, will collapse. –Leftist Scholar of Reason

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: The chicken egg tasting bad is not related to the earthquake. –Earthquake expert

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: There are hostile foreign powers gossiping about our eggs without authorization –Liu Jianchao

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Chinese chickens, come on! –Patriotic youth

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Because of the Beijing customer willfully stirring up trouble and saying the egg is bad, we have gone to the capital twice to mediate, without result. –Shanghai police

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: This is a recent rumor started by people on the internet.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: You are part of the small minority who is unaware of the truth, how could the egg taste bad?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: The nation is prosperous and the people are strong, why aren’t you just eating chicken meat?

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: No egg is perfect, so you have no right to gossip about this egg!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Whether eggs from the Qing dynasty tasted good or not, only people from the Qing dynasty know.

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: Think of the old society, poor people didn’t even have rice to eat, every day eating chaff and wild herbs, today’s happy life was paid for with the lives and blood of countless martyrs, you must treasure it!

Comment: This chicken egg tastes disgusting.
Response: This is the first stage of chickens laying eggs, if you want to eat good eggs you must wait until the higher stage, this early stage is a very long process.